Madonna on 'David Letterman': Eats pizza, calls Lourdes 'trouble,' says she'd rather be 'hit by a train' than marry again

Madonna’s return to The Late Show with David Letterman last night was like two old foes who’ve decided that at this stage of their careers, they get more mileage out of kidding each other than fighting.

But the segment did have its share of moments of Madonna and Dave at their Madge-iest and Dave-iest, respectively. When Letterman asked her if she’d ever marry again, Madonna said, “I’d rather get run over by a train.” She also said her daughter Lourdes was “trouble,” an only half-joking reference to the moodiness and rebellion of adolescence.

When Madonna asked Dave about what he’ll do when his son Harry becomes a teen, Dave said cheerily, “By that time, with any luck, I’ll be dead.”

Madonna feigned shock at that, but you could tell it appealed to her waspish sense of humor.

Then there was the fine let’s-get-Madonna-some-pizza stunt. Doesn’t it seem like ages since Dave has left the studio for a segment like this?:

The most unbelievable moment? When Madonna said, taking a dainty bite of pizza as though snacking on poison, “I have never gone to a New York pizzeria before.” Yeah, right: I’m sure there were a lot of nights in the ’70s when, as a destitute disco dolly, Madonna chomped down on a slice or two on a cold winter’s night in Greenwich Village…

Did you watch Madonna on Letterman?


Comments (84 total) Add your comment
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  • Scott

    It seems like being back in NYC has relaxed her a bit. She definitely has her quirks, but she has always been one of the less insane megastars.
    BTW Angelo’s pizza is AWESOME.

    • ben

      Yes. I grew up with the 80s & 90s music. I never saw that Madonna turns out to be the most “normal” one…

    • doll

      Spoken like someone who’s never had Chicago pizza

  • FormerMadgeFan

    Madonna a Wasp? Oh, that’s right, she gave up her Italian American heritage and traded it in by dedecting to England where she inexplicably becom=ame bff with Gwen-eth…………………………………………………….

    • claudenorth

      I think KT meant waspish, as in the flying, stinging insect, and not WASP-ish, as in the acronym.

      • Ken Tucker

        claudenoth is correct, thanks: wasp, not WASP

      • AA

        Wasps have a sense of humour?

        “Madonna feigned shock at that, but you could tell it appealed to her waspish sense of humor.”

      • layla

        what in the world is a waspish sense of humor? New one on me.

      • KL

        so you’ve never heard the term he’s used- ever heard of a dictionary? They’re even online now, it’s all the rage. Look it up!

    • confidential

      Did you mean deFecting?

      • Annie

        Did you know Luka Magnotta is Madonna’s cousin? They even look alike!

    • RayT

      Well, saying “I’m not a cheese person” is a very WASPy thing to say. No self-respecting Italian would ever utter such blasphemy.

      • snoopy

        lol! so true. gli italiani hanno bisogno formaggio!

  • frank

    what a coincidence – i hope she gets run over by a train too…….

    • Robbyrob

      But you took the time out of your busy constructive day to comment on her???

    • Allan

      What a coincidence, Frank. I think I know you, and I hope you get run over by a train. What a coincidence.

    • doll

      I wont wait for a train FRank. I’ll use my Range Rover on you…..a few times

      • john

        i guess you’re not concerned about global warming…..

  • BDS

    A simple she looked really well and they were playful and cute together would be enough. People are so negative and hateful in this country! Remember once your ancestors defected from somewhere! Think peaceful happy thoughts and it might spread from one to another and would it be awful for there to be more light in this dark world!

  • warlock6

    i do not like Madonna! her voice is awful, she can not sing. she is popular only because of her scandals. not suprising that she always try to do something scandalous in order not to be forgotten

    • Allan

      you’re such a joke. You don’t know music. Loser.

      • boocat

        And your taste is in your mouth….she cannot sing, she cannot act and she cannot dance.

    • richster106

      wow! who churns out the hits with as much consistancy as Madonna? No act in music history. There is talent there. You don’t like her, then move on from watching her Letterman gig here. Obviously, the people going to her concerts and buying her music for 27 years disagree.

      I’ll take her heartfelt songs over any of the divas out there, save Streisand, and day. And, she makes better classical pop than Streisand does.

      • veritas

        Michael Jackson had more #1 hits than Madonna and his songs are beloved the world over from 8 year old kids to seniors. the only people who even listen to Madonna songs anymore are the people who’ve always been her fans. she does not reach other demographics.

      • boocat

        That’s because she’s the best that today’s music has to offer. 99% of today’s music is garbage and has no shelf life. Streisand is not and never was a pop artist. Streisan can sing anything. Madonna can’t sing. Period!

  • Emmy

    This woman is a total poser. She changes as the wind blows. God bless her kids, they are going to need it.

    • Robbyrob

      Unlike lets say, Jon & Kate?

      • boocat

        What the hell do those two media whores have to do with Madonna? I get it…all three of them are no talent media whores.

    • Allan

      And your a total loser. Loser. With your 6 dollar an hour job at McDonalds.

      • snoopy

        is madonna paying you to attack comments that don’t favor her? you must be well paid.

      • Good Grief

        Wow, Allan. There is enough venom in your posts to down an elephant. Why don’t you take it down a notch huh? You don’t want an aneurism right before the weekend.

      • frank

        wow allan – apparently you know everybody and what they do for a living…..i’m quite impressed. maybe someday this talent will allow you move out of your parents basement….

      • boocat

        And you must be tone deaf if you think Madonna can sing.

    • paula

      The most successful solo live artist of all time. Choke on it.

      • toodles

        ummm…that would be Michael Jackson. and unlike Madonna, MJ had discernible musical talent.

  • mike s

    No, he meant WASP. She’s from Michigan, not New York.

    • Inigo Montoya

      Mike, you keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

    • Donna

      No, he meant “waspish” just like he said. A waspish sense of humor is a stinging sense of humor–sarcastic, etc. It’s a common phrase.

      • boocat

        I think the word you are all looking for is acerbic….look it up.

  • nycboy

    people always putting madonna down are simply doing her a favour.
    no wonder she managed to be on top of her game for so long!
    one can only amdmire her genious to become the most successful artist in the planet.
    you go girl!!!

    • boocat

      And then you woke up.

  • John

    Obviously the haters on here took the time to read the article and then watch the video in order to make their comments. You know what I do when I see an article about someone I am not a fan of? I skip it. It’s like you have nothing better going on in your life so you want to bring everyone down with you. Losers.

    • paula

      Its probably just fat pathetic Mariah Carey or her gay husband.

    • boocat

      I just don’t like people waxing eloquent on people that have no talent.

  • Jeff W.

    I’m sure her daughter is a nightmare (who needs to pluck her eyebrows). When you’re raised by a narcissist who walks the Earth with an undeserved sense of entitlement there’s no hope for you to be anything but “trouble”.

  • Really Madonna?

    “Are we really going to eat it?”

    That is how food is traditionally consumed darling. I know you prefer vitamin shots, but really now.

    • paula

      I wouldnt have ate it either…..paremesan cheese and olives? UGHHHH

  • Mia

    DREAM COUPLE!!

  • callie

    I read in a gossip column this week that she’s going to marry some 20 year old kid named Jesus. I hope she’s telling the truth about not wanting to marry. Madonna should not marry Jesus. Way too many shades of Oedipus there.

    • paula

      He’s 22, know-it all

  • pai

    It was totally fun. Doesn’t matter if you’re a fan of hers or not. Now if they could just keep the New York Rangers out of the mix. BLECH!

  • Phnam Ngyuen

    All I can say was that it was with very much interest that I see ms. Maddona on tv again. But her face look like it was being stretch too much to the back. I thing that she may be having some surgary on her eye or her face. Still she look like she enjoy to be with David.

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